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S'jirra & Corrinar

This is a Mini-Novel Based on the rp of S'jirra & my Husband's Character, Corrinar. There is alot of S'jirra Lore that I dont go too in-depth in her backstory here, so its a great read. Especially if you like dumb-cute-sappy romance. <3

Middas, Second SeedDuring the many moons of working with this S'rendarr-forsaken Dominion, an unknown Altmer frequently passes me by while roaming the halls of my workplace. A handsome one, I think. Wonder what division he's in. His expression always seems rather sullen. And when we briefly lock eyes, there is a tinge of curiosity to them.Strange, for his kind. For an Altmer's nose is typically high enough to make gazing upon anything lower... inconveniencing. This is the most demeaned I've felt since I learned to speak and write in Cyrodiilic. My whiskers and tail paint me in the same light as a floor scrubber despite my expensive circlet and adornments. Ziss' on the lot of them━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━Fredas, MidyearThe sun has set upon the limestone walls of Alinor. I am still in the library, catching up on paperwork.
It is quiet. The dusk is setting in. A few lit candles illuminate the shelves and desks. Truly, I would think it was beautiful if I didnt hate it here so much.Footsteps from the down the hall revealed to be that strange Altmer again. He approached me tonight, said his name was Corrinar. His family owned the estate that the Dominion is doing business in.
Of course...We exchanged basic pleasantries, and he went on his merry way. Almost as quickly as he came.━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━Reflecting on this night hours later: That was the first time I was spoken to as proper nobility, not a peasant. As if he didnt seem to mind my fur. It was... normal.I hope I see him again.

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Fredas, Sun's HeightIt has been over a month since my last writing. I did in fact meet that Corrinar character again. Actually, we speak daily now.I learned that he studies ancient technology. Particularly Dwemer, and occasionally goes spelunking for artifacts. That would explain the physique.He seems to be largely curious about me. Always inquiring about life in Anequina and the like; the contrast of a far away land so different from his own. From the terrain, to the weather, to the creatures that lurk the sands. Its refreshing to talk about home.━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━Tirdas, Sun's HeightAnother week, another test of endurance from the foul dominion council. While I am terribly homesick, Corrinar seems to want to leave his hometown. I think he is cooped up in Altmer society and roles. He's quite different from all High Elves I've ever met, down to preferring blunt weapons over the arcane. Everything about him feels upside down. Perhaps that is why he was so interested in me in the first place. We seem to compliment each other well.S'jirra is ...I am happy to have him here. I think he is happy I'm around too. He makes the hard days easier. Makes me laugh, and I give him a break from his difficult high society life.━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━Loredas, Sun's HeightDespite the apprehension I deal with on a daily basis here in Alinor, I feel a bit more at ease since meeting Corrinar a few months ago. Our routine breaks in the library have become my favorite part of the day. We regularly find ourselves laughing to tears. Making snarky remarks at the customs and--often--hypocrisy of the nobility here. While I'm reading, I catch him occasionally staring at me.The way he looks at this one me with those soft eyes gives me a warm feeling. I've found myself brushing my sleek fur more than three times a day.
Something has changed.━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━Mourdas, Sun's HeightHe's been talking about this week for ages. The ship is leaving for Hammerfell. From there, Corrinar will take horseback to The Reach. He goes there a couple time's a year to search the ruins for artifacts. It's his favorite activity....He'll be gone for a month...━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━

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Tirdas, Sun's HeightIts the last day of the month. The first day I wont see Corrinar, after months of daily interactions.I feel a bit of a backwards spiral. Nothing about the day is enjoyable anymore. Just more brushing-off from the grand council, more dumped paperwork, and no letters from home. I have nothing in the day to look forward to.
Ziss'vo.Later while reading in the library, low and behold, a familiar voice echoed from the railings above. "S'jirra! S'jirra!" This one I heard!
My chest burned and my ears perked up at the sound like a ja'khajiit at the new life festival. Ecstatic as I was, I remained cunning. I dismally look up and ask "I thought you were on your way out?"The Mer responded breathlessly, running down the stairs to meet me. He requested that I accompany him in the Reach. To go spelunking in the Dwarven Ruins with him. I had never seen him so excited before. He wore the biggest smile, and his attire had changed. Not that of a typical Altmer; In fact there was no subtlety to it at all. Big, clunky, dwemer looking armor. Likely something he picked up and polished himself.As an altmer, he looked like a goofball, but as an individual, I could get used to seeing him like this.Was he mad? S'jir I am needed here. I cannot just leave. I had never been so far north before. Not to mention in a dingy, dirty cave hundreds of years old.━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━Middas , Last SeedI am seasick. We've only been at sea for 21 hours... S'jirra has three more days of this.━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━Middas , Last SeedA week has transpired since my last writing. It has been quite the busy excursion. The weather is more biting than I would like, for khajiit fur is not meant for insulation. Corrinar seems to be right at home here. Its quite strange to see someone so proper-looking in such an archaic element and thrive. I will admit, its quite the attractive trait.Tomorrow we head deep into some mine that I cannot pronounce. I am not trained to fight, for I am a priestess of Alkosh and Khenarthi. I pray that perhaps I am overreacting. After all, the cave is centuries abandoned.

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Turdas, Last SeedI stepped on a switch in the mine. It triggered a snowball effect that awoken leagues of dwemer machines. They treated us as a threat and attacked.Minutes of fighting lasted hours. These machines were brutal. Their scrap metal was thick, and I was defenseless. My healing staff was useless here. Only Corrinar's axe stood in the way of our lives.He fought valiantly, but I could sense the altmer tiring. I created a forcefield barrier around us while we ran for an escape. The mine was long and winding, the adrenaline in my blood was boiling, but I was tired. No, I didnt want to die here. Not in some dwemer shaft far from my home. My family. My Legacy. My future. Merciful Alkosh, save us.We were surrounded.As they closed in, panting, I looked up at my cohort who was equally spent. Sweat beads dripping from his forehead and neck. S'jirra will never forget the look in his eyes. Those beautiful eyes. He muttered something I couldn't remember. I lifted my staff, and expanded the barrier to smash into the surrounding walls. Rocks fell from all directions, caving us in, ash and soot filled the air, and darkness....We woke. Coughing. The world spun and my ears rang. It was dusty and dank with a single streamline of light that signaled the way out.
Corrinar was already smashing his way through it. There were no automations to be found.We did it. We lived. I had never felt more alive in my life. My feelings in my headspace rearranged. This was a memory I would spend the rest of my life reliving.Breaking me from my thoughts, a sudden hand was felt on mine. Gentle, warm. My blood sang. My fur stood on-end all the way up my arm. I look up at him, and he looked down at me."You know, There was not a more interesting individual I would've rather been with on this excursion. Thank you, S'jirra. Now, lets go home." He said to me, and pulled me out of the darkness.And in that moment, I knew I'd fallen madly, in love.

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Loredas, Last SeedS'jirra is in trouble.Everything has changed. What a fool this one is. Has she forgotten of her fur; her lineage? Dull claws indeed S'jirra... A khajiit aristocrat would be laughing stock with a shave-skin companion...But... By S'rendarr, I am dramatically raptured. For I pray that it isn't cognitive bias that he seeks me out in a crowded room. The sound of his laughter sings in my dreams. Tell me he feels the same. Give me a sign. Never have I felt so out of control of my emotions.
Mara have mercy on my heart.━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━Tirdas, Last SeedWe settled in Daggerfall for the final evening before the ship-ride back to the isles. Naturally, we attracted the attention of every Breton man and woman we crossed on the streets. A high elf that towered above the crowds, and a woman covered in fur and a tail, stuck-out like a nereid in Alik'r Desert. Quite unsettling really, being neck deep in Covenant territory.There seemed to be some sort of festival going on. The aroma of sweets permeated the air. Lanterns of every color illuminated the wet streets. People were singing and dancing, minstrels were everywhere. Wholly entertaining to observe from the balcony of my inn-room. Their style of music was foreign, yet amusing."Hey," a tender voice from behind me. I whirl around at the familiar sound, my long locks floating behind.
There he was, holding his hand out to me.He likely noticed the hesitant expression on my muzzle. Because "Dance with me." came shortly after. Charming.I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear and accept his hand. The feel of his skin on my paw pads send shivers all the way up my neck. Mara, please, have mercy.Truly, we probably danced for hours, though it felt like minutes. The songs that sounded foreign became familiar. The space around my room disappeared. Wide awake, but I'm full of foolish reveries. Wondering if I make him feel in any way, as merry. I dare not share these sentiments with him, lest I jeopardize the one good thing I have in all of Summerset. Who knows how long I will be trapped there. If in a world where I cannot make him my own, I wish to at least fly to his side at any moment. Besides, I am Khajiit. We would earn the blessing of no one.I slow my movements to a stop.
Removing my hand from his shoulder while my eyes downcast, sobered by my final thought. The blonde looks down at me, ostensibly curious as he follows suit. "Is there something wrong?"After a bit of a pause, I look back up. "Thank you, for taking me with you on this trip." The blondes' expression doesn't change for a minute, seemingly processing that I didn't exactly answer his question. He sighs."No." He begins, "Thank you, for accepting my request." and lays his lips on the back of my hand, before sweeping away. Leaving me in my room with only my thoughts.

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Turdas, Last SeedFor the past two days, I've shut myself in my cabin on the ship. Not because of seasickness, but my own focus. Undoubtedly I'm going to return to piles of paperwork. Work that the sharp-eared snobs cannot be bothered to complete themselves. Truly, as bitter as I seem about the situation, I still respect the Dominion's leaders and their staff. My only wish is that the other counselors would listen to my strategies. For my say is equally important to theirs despite my fur. But they won't even give me the light of day.This one is stuck.I tried to convince mother to allow me to return home, that this endeavor was fruitless. All I was met with was, "You will honor the Natima family," and "Our daughter will not ruin the family name," rubbish. Charming woman indeed...I huff and lay my head in one hand, allowing my thoughts to wander as I boredly gaze into a flickering candle.
Part of me hopes that Corrinar is thinking of me right now. I haven't seen him in two days. Wonder what he's been doing. Wonder how he would feel if I did eventually go home. Would he care? Would he go about his daily life and forget about me completely? Do I have an impact on him as he does me? Or.... am I alone?I drop my gaze to my free hand, Uncurling my claws and eyeing each individual paw pad. The kiss he left me with was our final interaction. With only a brief addition of boarding the ship the next morning.Perhaps... perhaps this one should put these childish emotions to rest. For I shant allow them to sway me back and forth as they do. It is not productive, and I cannot change the reality that I am Khajiit; I belong with my own kind. In Anequina. At home.I close my eyes and I can see it... Glistening golden sands..Vast dusty winds... A grand aqueduct outlining the horizon as the sun sets beneath... then torchbugs swimming in Jone and Jode's light... As if to welcome you home...Yes. That is my home. That is where I belong.

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Fredas, Last SeedStepping off the ship onto dry land welcomed a sigh of relief, if only a brief one. The white spires Alinor that stretch into the sky were as beautiful as ever. But the novelty quickly fades, for I know now what lies within.After a brief take-in of the queen's city, I turn back to the boat and wait for my cohort to get off. Corrinar's blonde locks tower over the rest of the non-mer walking off the deck. Surely, he's been wondering where Ive been the past few days. Perhaps he'll scold me for not coming out. Or, dare I entertain, he'll even say he missed me. No— I told myself to brush these emotions aside.There he was. Tankard in hand, likely mead. A big smile on his features, chatting along with some Redguard couple. My chest pathetically tightened upon seeing that smile. Strange as the mer was— My, was he charming.Even stranger, I couldnt detect any concern in his eyes. He seemed devoid of any sort of care to where I'd been. In fact he seemed fine, more than fine.My heart sank. Suddenly I felt as if I'd been kicked in the teeth. Ive...Been missing for days. My maw gaped. In an instant, my body teleported to the very instant I knew I was inlove with him. Darkness and soot all around me, lost. Then a golden stream of light, signaling the way out... the light of day. His messy golden locks shimmering in the light. When he said to me, 'There was no one else he'd prefer to be by his side.'And yet, there he is, completely careless of where I am or otherwise. Was I too forward with his words? Did I dare assume I may be someone special to him?And that moment we danced. Our faces so close. Euphoria like none had ever experienced. How many others had he danced with? Something so intimate to me, possibly just another cultural gesture to him."S'jirra!" He exclaimed, finally noticing me standing there. My thoughts whirring. He approached and dipped his head to me. "This ...." "And..." "Theyre dwemer antiquarians! I told them..."
My thoughts and attention went in and out as disbelief brimmed my mind. He's fine. He doesnt care....He doesnt, feel the way I do..My fur bristled. I sank my fangs into my cheeks just to avoid the inevitable water pricking at my tear ducts. And any attempt I had at dropping sentiments had gone. Enough. Ive had enough.
In the middle of the interaction, I turned tail and walked away. I needed to get away before the stream of tears won. Walk Faster. Get back to my quarters. From behind me I can hear the Altmer calling my name, but I do not respond.And as this one currently sits in her room writing of today's events, her tears spill onto the parchment. Thoughts float around in her mind of things that could have been. Her mind made up. Drowning in her sorrows.

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Loredas, HearthfireAn announcement was made at the board meeting today. A Dominion spy has identified the location of a squadron of the Ebonheart Pact that is laying waste to scores of dominion soldiers. They've been labeled an elusive plague amongst the troops. Always seemingly knowing where we'll strike next, and countering with a bitter vengeance that leaves a river of spilled blood.
They've been located at a temporary base between Chalman and Arrius, and they need one of us to lead the frontlines. Us--Diplomats--without passing information to too many mouths.Perhaps S'jirra has a few whiskers loose. She I thought, 'these sharp-eared shave-skins have likely never even seen a scratch in their lives. S'jir I am a priestess, a healer. And after all, I dont belong here. Perhaps this is my one chance to leave this dreadful place.Not once did it cross her mind that the mission could fail. That I could potentially die on Cyrodiilic soil. Still, I stood up from my seat and declared "I will go."After a long pause of everyone in the room, the High Elf Sergeant smiled at me. "Very well, S'jirra of Northern Elsweyr will bear this burden. May you lead your armada to victory."━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━Later that evening, I sat on the bridge of a brook just outside of Cey Tarn Keep. This was my favorite place in all of Summerset Isles. I come here once a week at least. It was quiet. Only the sound of the soft water on rocks and the grass blowing in the breeze. The sky was painted a bright orange. Great blue herons dotted the water. True peace."I thought you might be here." A familiar voice accompanied by the clopping of horse hooves. He dismounts and parks his horse next to mine.Ziss'vo. This one was not prepared for an emotional episode right now."You werent at the library today." He continued."Very well spotted of you.." I spat. What did he want anyway?"S'jirra..." He huffed. In honesty, I never heard this tone from him before. "Why are you going to war?""Why not?" I stood and turned away from his gaze. "It's about time I got away from this place anyway.""I know you dont like it here," he continued, walking closer to me. I could practically feel the burning of his eyes from behind me, and it stung. "But dont you think going to the front lines is too far?""What do you know about it?!" I snap, whipping my head back around to look up at the mer. "What do you know about being thousands of miles away from the only ones who care about you, in favor of enduring cruelty from tyrants for moons unending? Tell this one!"The blonde only probed me sternly. When he gave me no answer, I turned back around."What's wrong with you lately?""You're clueless aren't you?""I don't exactly enjoy reading minds." He paused. "S'jirra, if I've done something wrong, I wish you'd just be out with it.""It matters not!" I voiced. "Regardless, in two days time I will be on a boat to Cyrodiil. Its been fun Corrinar," I begin to walk forward, "Perhaps our paths will cross again one d--"My wrist was snatched, cutting me from finishing my sentence. Chills instantly travel up my arm to the rest of my body. An uneasy excitedness all too familiar. I whirl around to find him bent down to my height. His eyes downcast."S'jirra. I don't want you to go."I ignited. Suddenly in that moment I was ready to give it all away. Unload everything. Nothing else mattered. He had me in the palm of his hands. Damn.
It took a good ten seconds of staring for me to choke a reply. "You didn't seem too concerned after days without seeing me, on that ship...""I... I was afraid to..." He muttered. "After the previous evening, I thought you wanted space. I thought I'd ruined everything... I didn't wish for you to think less of me, so I distanced myself." His eyes met with mine. "And when you walked away from me after departing the ship, I suspected my fears had been realized."I was dumfounded. "Then why did you come here..?"I could see him hesitate. He shifted slightly. "Because I am a stubborn Mer." He began. "And I wasn't about to let the one thing I desired most slip from my fingertips before she goes off to war."

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"And I wasn't about to let the one thing I desired most slip from my fingertips before she goes off to war."Utter collision.His words echoed moonsugar symphony in my mind. For I could no longer hear the running of the river or the rustle of wisteria trees. Only the beating of my own heart. As nervous as I was for what would happen next, I needed to know."...Tell me that my fantasies aren't just in my head, Corrinar. Tell me that your heart pines when you look upon my face... As mine does."Those cyan eyes shifted from woe to shock. Did.. he really have no idea? My feelings written on my face and he is none the wiser? I was beginning to think obliviousness meant disinterest before he responded."I... would tell you a thousand times if I could." His grip on my wrist loosened. Khenarthi could have swept this one away and she would've been happy."S'jirra, when I'm with you," He breathed, "I don't feel so... alone. Being around you day after day has become something I treasure. You're so... Captivating. So different from anyone I've ever met. And, no. Not because of the tail." We both stifled a laugh."I confess, you've enchanted me.. S'jirra. And I hope that--" He paused, his grip on my wrist slid down to my hand. Chills erupted. Just slightly sweaty it was, wonder if he was as nervous as I... Cute.
"--That spell never lifts."Oh, sweet Mara.....I step closer to him, lifting my free hand up to his cheek. To feel his soft skin on my paw pads was surreal. He leaned into my touch. Strands of messy locks curled around my claws. My heart was pounding miles a minute by this time, and my headspace jumped from thought to thought. Overjoyed that he shared my sentiments, wondering if we could make it work. The irrefutable lack of support from both our families. Customs of our species. How long could we last? How would those lips feel over mine? Oh, he has no idea... My thoughts..."How long..?" I wondered aloud. The Altmer scratched his head, taking a moment to respond. "I always found you attractive. The way you dress and carry yourself, all prim and proper. The way your hair swings when you walk. After we began to speak regularly, I hoped one day for a chance. I felt this urge to learn everything about you. Still, I crave to know more."I could feel my face heating up from under my white fur. Flattery thick enough to slice with a knife, and I was devouring every moment of it."As do I.." I finally reply. "I... dont know what happened but," I shift my attention back to the river. "But somethings...changed in me. Since my time with you, here.. I am not the same person I was when I left Anequina... And I feel that when I return, nothing else will be the same, not for me."He takes some of my hair and moves it behind my shoulder, allowing his fingers to graze my fur to the crook of my neck. He does this quite often actually, but the affect is different now. "You're the reason for that change..."He chuckled at that. "If that's the case then guilty as charged. Does this mean I have your permission to court you then? Milady?"I smiled and laughed, but just then, doom struck me. I almost forgot... Im going to war.Im going to leave him.My sudden change of mood must've been transparent. "What's wrong..?""This is never going to work Corrinar... Im going to Cyrodiil.""Im going with you""You cant. You shouldn't even know about this mission.""I shouldn't know about what's going on in my own hou--""That's not the point. This assignment is top secret. They've only drafted 300 soldiers for this..."Corrinars expression quickly turned to that of horror. "Three Hundred?" He repeated. "That's a suicide mission!""Its the mission I've been told to lead.""S'jirra!" He firmly grabs my shoulders and turns me to him "You need to reconsider. Tell the Sergeant you made a mistake.""And then what? Risk my families name? Have the entire Aldmeri Dominion remember S'jirra Natima as the coward of Elsweyr that betrayed her post and costed countless lives? I already receive enough slack from my consorts. No. I simply must go."Silence fell upon us. Corrinar just stared at me. For the first time, I couldn't pinpoint his look. I knew not what he was thinking."There are worse things...." He finally spoke. My gaze hits the floor."If I die, I will have died serving my cause..""Ridiculous! And you will have slipped from my grasp forever." He dropped his grip from my shoulders and paced around with hands on his hips, staring at the pavement. I didnt know what to say."Just... Run away...""What...?""S'jirra.. lets just, go. I know you're just as miserable in your status as I am. Lets leave it all. We could go North. To Skyrim, or Eastern Hammerfell. Disappear.""I ... I cannot just--""Please, S'jirra." He grabbed my hand again, kneeling down to my height. "I don't want see a day where I could no longer grab your hand.."

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"Please, S'jirra." He grabbed my hand again, kneeling down to my height. "I don't want to see a day where I could no longer grab your hand.."He was saying everything I had ever wanted my ears to hear. But under these circumstances, my heart was breaking. Yes, its true. For I love being a priestess, but not for royalty in Rimmen. And I love Queen Ayrenns message, but not for her cause. Being in Summerset where silly customs are performed for the sake of keeping to tradition is redundant. Knowing Corrinar these past five months have been the sweetest escape. Me and him, together.But that cannot last. In the end, responsibilities must be met. Life must go on. And no one will do it for you if you don't do it yourself."...I cant...."I couldnt tell you how long we sat there. Staring back at eachother, hoping I would reconsider. After what seemed like minutes, he released my hand, muttered something I didnt understand under his breath, mounted his horse and left. Leaving me alone in the night.I'd never seen him so upset.━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━Back in my chambers, I laid on the chaise staring at the ceiling. Empty, I was. That look he left me with has left me with frozen veins. I never wanted to be the cause of that look. I yearned to throw myself into his arms and just be loved by him. Why did it have to be so difficult? Were going to have to get used to being apart. Perhaps permanently. Who knows how long this mission will last.I pray... One day, I will be forgiven.━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━Tirdas, HearthfireWhat an ugly day.
Fitting, for the day I get on the ship headed for Cyrodiil. The Skies are as dull as my mood.I havent seen Corrinar since our tiff. By S'rendarr, I missed every bit of him. The three days spent without him were long. I had hope that despite his anger towards me, he would at least seek me out one last time before my departure. As the hours draw ever so closer, my faith fades.And there I was. Infront of the ship, standing there as blurry faces all around me passed by to board. People laughing, crying, telling their loved ones farewell. The weather worsened as the day went on. A storm would surely strike soon. My hair was a mess in the blowing wind. For once, I cared not.This was it.My life was about to change forever. As I take that first step forward, my heavy eyes begin to billow out and pour onto my muzzle. No. I didnt want this... Until now, Id blindly waltzed through my life following orders, carrying out duties, listening for the call of Alkosh. Finally, I actually knew what I wanted. But just when Id gotten within arms reach, it slips away by the slight of my own hand. Regret. I never even told him I loved him.And I do. By the divines I do."The storm be a-comin'! We must depart now! Get Goin'!" I heard one of the crewmates from deeper onboard. I stood on the balcony deck, letting the heavy winds brush through my fur. The winds of change have come. So long, Summerset. Until the next chapter in our lives.Below me were crowds of people of all races. Wives, Husbands, children. Waving and cheering goodbye as they see the ship off. Bittersweet to see, before we hit the battlefield."S'jirra!"My ears immediately perk up at the sound. I frantically look up towards the sound, hoping to see any trace of the source.The ship slowly begins to move. No."Corrinar?!" I desperately shout, hoping for a last remnant of hope. My claws dug into the railing as I leaned against it."S'jirra!" I heard again, and then I saw it. A wisp of messy blonde sprinting through the crowds. My heart seized.He ran. Through the people, past the pier, up the dock, he jumped the small gap from the dock to the boat, grabbing onto the railing I was holding. And before I could even react,He plants his lips onto mine."I love you," He breathes after we part. "Come back soon..""....I love you too..."Then he smiles at me in a way that would make an aedra cry, before jumping back to the dock.My pathetic heart couldnt take it as the waterworks started again. "I'll come back! I will!""Promise me!"I-I Promise! I promise...."...The Port was almost out of sight. But my gaze never left that dock. The rain poured down, still I did not move.I will return.

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I've not written in three months.These have been the most gruesome days of my life. I sleep three hours a night. I bathe twice a week. I walk on foot for miles with the same 300 troops. I've learned them all by name. I know their individual strengths and weaknesses; their stories. All different races. Khajiit, Bosmer, Altmer. Even Imperials, Redguards, Argonians sprinkled about. Race mattered not, for we were all brothers and sisters in war.Somehow, we'd been discovered by the Ebonheart terrorists we were after. Despite the secrecy surrounding the objective. We've been chasing after their battalion ever since, while also trying to avoid the front lines when they get too close.Scores of the horrors I've seen have haunted my darkest nightmares. Nobody can properly express the feeling of being hunted. Hearing the gutteral shrieks of mortality. Smell the soot of burning skin, fur, scale. Adjust to the reality that living, breathing souls were now lifeless husks in the grass. No one should ever have to experience this. It's a wonder that anyone leaves this situation happy.

When we finally settle for the evenings, I lay outside of my tent. Staring into the fire, and through the rolling hills where torchbugs dance in the dying light. My thoughts allow themselves to wander. To take me away from this horrid place. To a place of grace and gold. I see white walls and wisteria trees. Birds softly chirping in the morning mist. The face of the mer I love smiling back at me. To think, he single-handedly had me reminiscing Summerset over Elsweyr. For my new home is wherever he is ...
As you can imagine, letters halfway across Nirn arrive few and far between. I have received two from him, and have sent two back. I pray that he receives them safely, for my heart is carried on that parchment. I promised I would come back. I intend to stand by that promise. Wait for me my love, may S'rendarr answer our prayers.━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━They knew exactly when we'd strike... They were ready.What was supposed to be a swift assassination of bloodthirsty tyrants turned into an onslaught of carnage. Spells flew, hammers broke bones, swords clashed. After seemingly hours, a stalemate was reached.I stood upon the battlefield in horror. So many fallen of my brothers and sisters. I couldn't heal them all. Too many had their blood shed before my eyes. I couldn't do anything to save them. The pact looked on, ready and waiting for us to make a move."...What should we do captain..?" A bosmer said from behind, looking up at me. I did not know. I had no answer. I wasn't cut out for this; why did I do this? So much death.I stepped past the lifeless bodies on the dirt of red and yellow. They had the higher ground. I could see some of them hiding up in the Ayleid ruins with crossbows, ready to stick me. I knew they weren't going to let us leave. For I learned as a counselor this faction wasn't about mercy. They've laid unbridled waste to so many defenseless. Raiding the sleeping, the eating, the unarmed. Complete barbarians."We should retreat. The mission has failed! Allow some of us to survive!" Aurelian said, an Altmer with a bow."They're not going to let us retreat..." I replied. We were staring death in the face. There weren't many of us left. We were outnumbered. I look back down to the bodies at my feet. Faces of my friends, my enemies. The notion of joining them soon put ice in my veins. The only thing I could do now was close my eyes and pray to the divines. To grant me passage to the sands beyond the stars. I never thought it would end like this.

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The only thing I could do now was close my eyes and pray to the divines. To grant me passage to the sands beyond the stars. I never thought it would end like this....But it won't....I made a promise. A promise and a dream. Higher than any other dream. My eyes glazed. The sands of time weave out many possibilities, but the first cat works in mysterious ways. Alkosh already has a plan. I'm supposed to get through this. I could see it. I could see us. Living happily. Laughing, crying, loving....I could see...A little Tojay, who looked a lot like me......I knew I'd been blessed. I've served Alkosh well, for he has gifted me with insight. I was not going to die tonight. I mustn't. It was not yet my time. I was chosen to lead this armada for a reason. This was my moment.I snap to my senses just in time to deflect an incoming arrow with my forcefield. "TOBIAS!" I call to my cousin, a Senche-Raht who joined me on this mission.He responded suit, roaring and charging into battle. It has begun again. The rest of the legion charging in thereafter. Spells and arrows fly in our direction. I raise my staff and expand my forcefield barrier as wide as I could muster. Attempting to absorb all of the incoming damage to save my troops. I knew if I'd done this before in Skyrim with Corrinar, I could do it again. This time I wasnt going to just save two, I was going to save an army. My golden orb grew and grew until it could cover the radius of 47 running troops. From afar, I'm sure it was a spectacle to see, though I wasn't sure how long I could hold this.One by one, we drove the enemy back until many of our battalion were able to meet them in the Ayleid ruins face to face. Dunmer spells were no match for an Altmers. Nords couldn't compete with Pahmar and Senche-Raht. Bosmer's arrows pierce deep in Argonian scales. Still the spells and arrows hammered into my forcefield. The staff in my arm grew heavier and heavier, my arms and knees began to shake.As if on queue, a bosmer named Coth, and a Dagi named Rar'jo came to either side of me, wrapping their arms tightly around me. An Imperial named Vestiela grabbed my arms and held me firm. I took a moment to look at the three of them. They all seemed to smile back with this newfound confidence, nodding. The tides have turned. We were going to live.It took another ten minutes from that point for us to overrun the enemy. We killed the merciless. The ones we didn't kill were put in spell-binding chains. I could hear laughter and cheering from inside the ruins. We did it. We won. Those of us who stayed back began to celebrate as well, and I finally lowered my staff, allowing the barrier to disperse. We walked inside to join our comrades crying and singing. I chuckled happily at everyone's joy and followed along.And then it happened. In my relief and triumph; I must have not noticed among the bodies on the ground I walked over a dunmer woman lay in the dirt taking her final breaths. She sought me out, waited for me. Used the last of her strength to conjure a revenge fire as bright as the Tribunal in her hand, and grabbed my passing ankle.The pain was instant. Shrieks of agony, I fell backwards as the flames traveled up my leg. Searing my fur as tinder and boiling off my skin. I heard only the ringing of my ears and the beating of my heart through shrills of torment. Hazy and blurry faces crouched around me. Mouths moving but saying nothing. I could see black ashes flying into the sky behind them. The last thing I remember were my eyes looking up to the sun, and everything goes white.━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━"...What happened." Were my first words upon general consciousness. My voice was coarse as rocks."You have been sleeping for three days... It is Louredas. Almost midday. And it would seem you've made quite the name for yourself child, for Alkosh smiles upon you.""...Mother?""Yes, I am here child. Try not to sound so sullen about it. For you must return to the land of Elves to finish your duties soon enough." She gives that persnickety Alfiq grin that she's always had.I open my eyes to see the bedroom I'd lived in since a little Ja'khajiit. Familiar walls and columns of Brass. Vibrantly colored tapestries depicting the divines lining the walls. Exotic flowers in cerulean vases. Home.I sat up and rubbed over my eye. "It is wonderful to see you mother. I've missed you."She just smiled. "That was a foolish thing you did, my child. Going off to war like that. Still, it would seem you've earned the favor of the Dominion, just as I instructed. Well done. Word has quickly spread, you should have an easier transition back to Alinor. For now, enjoy your return home." She hopped from her seat and began to make her way out. "Do take your time walking around, child. For that was a grave wound on your ankle. Our healers did their very best. Tobias will be happy to see you well." She paused at the door. "Oh, and Kiseravi should be in shortly to bring you Moonsugar pastelitos."I laid back down and stared at the ceiling. Half excited to finally taste moonsugar again, half wondering what ensued after I passed out; if everyone made it back home okay, if I'd ever see anyone again. I lifted the blankets to get a good look at my leg. Bandaged, should've known. There was a faint pinging sting every now and then as I moved around, at least I could still feel it.Wonder if I'd ever walk the same again━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━2 days have passed. I was limping around fine now. It's been an eventful two days catching up with family, Tobias, and some of my entourage that ended up staying in Rimmen. For so long, I dreamed of my return. So long, I yearned for all the delights of home. Now... I couldn't help but feel distant.Bittersweet. For I am not the Khajiit I once was. I've matured. Both spiritually and culturally. Seeing furry faces on every passerby felt almost unethical to me anymore. I've adjusted to a melting pot over the course of a year, I miss the variety. I now find myself attempting to revert back to my normal Khajiit-speak rather than Cyrodillic. Everything is backwards.And most importantly, Elsweyr didn't feel like home anymore.My heart wrenched upon that final thought. Ziss, I've tried to push the ache to the back of my mind, but I seem to have only opened a floodgate of hurt. Corrinar... Three and a half months since I've seen that beautiful face. Since I've met him in that library, catching that smug grin he gives me when he teases me. The torchbugs that buzz in my abdomen when we lock eyes, or when he grazes my fur with the back of his hand. I wonder.... what he was doing.... if he knew I was okay, if he knew I would return to him. Would he wait for me?I sigh and stare down at the water flowing out of the Aquaduct. This late afternoon picnic with myself and my thoughts quickly became dismal. "Oh...My love... I know not how much more I can take of this.... for I miss you more than words can say...I long for the day I will cling to you..""I look forward to that too."My head snaps up."And I think that, as long as I haven't been replaced by the water..." The blonde mer dismounts from his horse. "I won't ever let you out of my sight again.""Corrinar..."Fin

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